Friday, November 4, 2016

Reflections on being a single during the holidays

Christmas and Birthdays can be hard. 

Birthdays were a day of celebration, now they can be a time of regret, a time where you remember that you’re still waiting for the big things in life, you’re still just as confused about life and love as last year…and you’re still celebrating this birthday alone. 
I try to forget about my age and I think of it as try to grasp the excitement of this being my own personal holiday to celebrate me. Yet, I still find myself blinking away tears.

Now for Christmas, I think there are many reasons
      1. The winter holidays don’t have the magic they used to have. Christmas is not as exciting when you can buy yourself what you want when you want (within reason.)
2. Times change. People change. People pass away. Those Christmases of the golden dawn of youth when your grandparents were still young and also still with you can never return. 
 3. You don’t have your own family. No children to train in decorating or making Christmas cookies. No little eyes to watch light up as they open they unload their stockings and open the presents you selected for them. No one other half to kiss under the mistletoe or buy presents for. Just a nomad. You don’t really fit in.
4. Like Birthdays, it’s another time of year where you wonder what you did wrong again.